


These Foolish Games

by AmiMendal



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Not Epilogue Compliant, One Shot, Song fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 16:42:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20696744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmiMendal/pseuds/AmiMendal
Summary: This was originally posted to FFN on December 15th, 2012. Song lyrics are italicized. The story is in Draco's POV. DH compliant, but EWE.Disclaimer: I own about a hundred yards of fabric, but I do not own the HP universe. I also do not own the song/lyrics used. Please don't sue.





	These Foolish Games

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted to FFN on December 15th, 2012. Song lyrics are italicized. The story is in Draco's POV. DH compliant, but EWE.
> 
> Disclaimer: I own about a hundred yards of fabric, but I do not own the HP universe. I also do not own the song/lyrics used. Please don't sue.

-.-.-

She found a strange comfort in me after the Dark Lord fell. I've never been entirely sure why, but she came to me when she needed to talk. It may have been my charm or good looks, but something told me it was more personal than that. She needed someone who didn't know the heartache she felt. People looked at her and saw the brother that she lost, or the brother that was now a shunned werewolf.

She needed someone who had preconceived notions and wanted to prove herself.

Every week she would come to my flat. Just one night a week, and yet that seemed to make a difference for her. I didn't particularly care either way; she wasn't a bother anymore. For months we would spend an entire night staying up, talking about the war or nonsensical things to get her mind off of the pain.

Six months after the fall of the Dark Lord, we were sitting by the fireplace in my flat. Her petite frame was covered with a throw blanket as she leaned on the arm of my couch. Her pink lips were pursed on the mug of cocoa in her hands before she asked me a question I had not expected.

"When was the first time you noticed me at school?"

My eyebrows must have shot up because she smiled for the first time in nearly a month. Not that I kept record or anything.

I sighed, leaning forward from my chair to set my own mug down on the coffee table. I wracked my brain for a moment before the memory washed over me. "Would've been your third year, I think, my fourth. I thought it strange to see someone so happy to be out in a storm. _You took your coat off and stood in the rain," _I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped,"Come to think of it,_ you were always crazy like that."_

This earned another smile and my limbs were suddenly warm. I blamed the hot cocoa. "What about you?" I asked. "And I mean noticed me in a good way," I attempted a joke.

She bit her lip thoughtfully and I couldn't help but want to do it for her. Her eyes lit up in remembrance. "I know. It was your sixth year, my fifth-"

"It took that long?" I asked, a little defensively. She laughed heartily and the warmth spread from my limbs into my chest. Damn cocoa.

"Don't interrupt, Draco," she teasingly reprimanded. Oh I love how she says my name, as if it's the easiest thing in the world. "You were sitting by the lake, by yourself, _and I watched from my window._ I was sure you were coming up with some smart-alec insult for my family, but when you turned your face, you looked so sad." Her eyes fell to the cup in her hands, lowering her voice to a whisper. _"Always felt I was outside looking in on you._ It seemed like you had the world figured out, even if it was in your own twisted way. You saw people for what they were, flaws and all, and at that moment, you hated what you saw."

She set her cup down next to mine, empty. "_You were always the mysterious one with dark eyes and careless hair_. I remember thinking those eyes deceived your true nature."

She had me pegged the exact moment I figured it out myself. How ironic. "Well you, Miss Ginny Weasley… You were a spitfire. There, I said it, a spitfire. And you dressed well, which was surprising, considering your upbringing, no offense," she shrugged at my honesty,_ "You were fashionably sensitive but too cool to care."_

It was well into the night and quite near morning when she fell asleep on my couch. She could only ever sleep after we spent hours talking.

-.-.-

It was unusual for her to come on a Tuesday. Fridays were usual and Sundays were occasional, but never a Tuesday. The rain was masking her tears, but I'd seen those eyes before and I knew she'd been crying. "It's raining," she said simply.

I nodded. "Yes, it is."

She rushed towards me and crashed her lips against mine.

It felt so good and so wrong simultaneously. She tasted of tears and apples and firewhiskey. She was upset and she wanted comfort in another way, a way we had never done before. And I was so willing to give it.

We moved from the foyer to the living room, desperately removing clothes as though our lives depended on it. Her lips were soft and warm, clashing drastically to the chill on her skin. I didn't care in the slightest. I probably should have, but I couldn't. Not then.

Finally, in my simply-furnished bedroom, she whispered my name so sensually I thought my heart would burst in my chest. I wiped the last evidence of tears and whispered hers back, hoping she would feel how real this was. How real it could be.

Later in the night, as I lie there watching her sheet-slathered body sleep, I wondered if she would regret this in the morning. I decided to worry about it then.

-.-.-

I was awake before she was, although that didn't bother nor surprise me. I was showered, dressed, and making breakfast when she came into the kitchen. Her red hair was mussed with sleep and she wore one of my t-shirts over her knickers. She looked beautiful.

"What happened last night?" she asked, scratching her head sleepily.

I poured her a cup of tea, two sugars extra cream. "_You stood in my doorway with nothing to say, besides some comment on the weather._" That earned a smirk and I handed her the warm mug of comfort.

"Thanks," she said. I nodded, taking a sip of my own.

We were silent for a while, although not uncomfortably so. She broke the quiet with another surprising question. She was good at those.

"Did we shag last night?"

There was an innocent curiosity in her tone and I suddenly felt nervous. Should I lie to make her feel better? I had prided myself on always telling her the truth, even if it was ugly honesty. I couldn't stop now.

"Draco, I woke up naked. I'm not a child, I can do the math."

I tried not to choke on my tea. "Does it matter either way?" I asked.

She lifted the cup to her lips, smirking. "Not particularly."

I shrugged. "Okay then." Things were so easy with Ginny. With the Dark Lord gone, I felt so free. I was free from the domineering emptiness in my heart, and she filled it so effortlessly.

She ran her fingers through her red hair, attempting to manage her bedhead. "_Well…_"

I wanted to take her into my arms and ravish her with kisses. I wanted to feel her skin against mine again, erase all of her grief and replace it with unlimited happiness. Then an overbearing weight dropped into my stomach. She didn't feel this…whatever this was. I was her friend, her confidant, her comforter.

Whatever I had fixed last night came back, and her brown eyes flashed with sadness again. They glistened with unshed tears, threatening to escape, to show her recurring sorrow.

"Ginny-"

"Don't, Draco. Just don't." She sniffled, wiping her eyes with the sleeves of my shirt.

I set my tea on the counter and took the few steps to embrace her. "I don't want you to cry," I whispered.

"I'm just so sad, Draco. All the time. I'm sick of being sad."

"You don't have to explain-"

"Would you stop it? I'm trying to tell you something!"

I stood back, my hands on her shoulders in hopes to calm her. "If talking about it makes you upset, than-"

"_In case you failed to notice, in case you failed to see, this is my heart bleeding before you. This is me down on my knees. _You think I want to be sad? You think I want to cry for hours on end? You're the only one who makes me feel better, and don't even bother asking me why."

My hands slid down her arms before coming back to hang lifelessly at my sides. "Ginny, this is killing me._ These foolish games are tearing me apart._ I let you come to me every week, why? Because I feel responsible! I feel like I caused this, all of this! Do you know how it feels to be on the other end of the sword?"

She didn't respond right away. Her eyes, usually so warm and alight with life, were searching mine for something. She was searching for something I couldn't give.

When she found nothing, I found my voice again. "You come here, every week, at all hours of the night for answers I can't give you. You ask questions I hate answering and you say things that hurt. I know you don't mean them, I tell myself you don't mean them...but that doesn't take the pain away." I wiped a tear from her cheek with my thumb, "I don't know if I can take your pain away."

I couldn't help the mix of emotions that was bubbling in my veins. I wasn't mad at her, not at all. I was mad at the world. She was sick of being sad, but I wasn't sick of comforting her. I would never get sick of that. If I was the last puzzle piece in her recovery, I would be there until the end of time. But I don't want to be the piece that gets manipulated into the wrong place.

She sniffled again, _"And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart, _Draco."

"Please don't say my name with so much emptiness," I begged. _"You're breaking my heart."_

-.-.-

She didn't come for a while after that. I knew where she was, home at the Burrow as volunteers fixed Hogwarts slowly, but I did not go to her. Years of hatred didn't affect our friendship but I wasn't sure if anything could repair our parents' strife.

I missed her so much it physically hurt. I couldn't sleep and I was sure she wasn't either. It was a month before she came back again.

Skiving off work that day was the best decision I made since she left. When I opened the door, her hair was being swept up by the wind and she held a box of her mother's homemade croissants.

I smirked, stepping aside to let her in. She graced me with a smile but it didn't reach her eyes. The tension was palpable but it was more apprehension than anything else.

"I'm sorry about what I said. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings," I said, leading her into the kitchen and making a fresh pot of coffee.

"I had an epiphany," she said, setting the breakfast treat acting as treaty on the counter before jumping up to sit next to it. She watched me as I gathered the sugar and cream.

"When?"

She checked her watch, "About twenty-four hours ago."

I waited for her to elaborate, staring at her intently. She reciprocated my expression and I had to bite back a laugh. "And what was it?"

"Well, I went to Bill and Fleur's yesterday for breakfast. As we smoked outside and waited for Fleur to finish burning the eggs, I told Bill about what happened. He said if he were in your shoes, with someone other than his sister of course, he would've gone berserk months ago. Apparently you were a ticking time-bomb, or whatever the Muggle saying is."

Imagining that conversation between her and her brother made me smile. "_You're always brilliant in the morning, smoking your cigarettes and talking over coffee."_

I handed her a steaming mug and she furrowed her eyebrows, "Who said anything about coffee?" I knew she was teasing me because she smirked before offering a wink and taking a sip of her coffee.

She set it on the counter next to her, "Shouldn't you be at work?"

"Lucky for you, I Floo'ed my boss a few minutes before you showed up. I'm taking a personal day."

"Oh, lucky for me, you say? I can always leave and you can spend the day wallowing by yourself." She elbowed me softly in the ribs and I took it in stride. Besides, Mrs. Weasley's croissants were still warm and the smell was fogging my reflexes.

-.-.-

Two nights later, we were drinking wine in my flat as I recalled one of the first conversations we had. It had been awkward, polite talk for the first few hours. I couldn't stand the tension so I put on a record. She played with a strand of hair, listening to the music and suddenly looking very comfortable.

"Do you remember the first time you came here?" I asked.

The wine didn't seem to affect her mind, but it made her cheeks flush with color and she bit her lip in thought. It was rather adorable. "I remember coming but no conversation comes to mind. Did I say something spectacular or memorable?"

Our eyes met and I felt that familiar feeling of love overcome me. Damn, I love this girl. Damn it to hell. "Nothing particularly brilliant but we spoke about simpler things like_ your philosophies on art. _I played a record to rid that awkward silence. _Baroque moved you, you loved Mozart. And you'd speak of your loved ones as I clumsily strummed my guitar."_

A soft smile played on her lips, "Ah yes. I remember now. You look good with a guitar in your hands."

I could sweep her up in my arms right now if only she would let me. I didn't move and I didn't ask, but I let my mind imagine it for a moment.

"Did I ever tell you why I cried that night?" Ginny asked, snapping me from my daydream.

I gave a half-shrug. "It doesn't even matter now."

"Well, excuse me!" she said defensively. Oh, there's the wine talking._ "Guess I've mistaken you for somebody else! Somebody who gave a damn!"_

"Ginny, what did you want from me? I was just as lost as you were-"

"Lost how? No one you loved was- Y-You didn't watch your friends and family die beside you. You didn't have to listen to people talk about you as if you weren't even there! Like a child!"

"You were a child, Ginny."

"Oh sure, take their side."

The laugh escaped before I could stop it and she glared at me. I offered a reassuring smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to it like that." Her brown eyes bore into mine and she finally softened. She sighed and played with the fringe of the throw blanket next to her.

We were quiet for what seemed like hours but I'm sure was only a few minutes. I hate silence. I really can't stand it, especially with her.

"I think I love you, Ginny," I whispered. It was so quiet I didn't think she heard me, but her gaze met mine. "And that's weird for me."

"Weird how?"

I laid my head back against the chair, hoping the truth would make everything alright again. "It's weird because I-… I never saw myself with someone like you."

She cocked an eyebrow, "Someone like me? Should I be offended?"

The fact that I laughed again only proved how deep my feelings were. It was so easy to laugh around her. "No, of course not. I just saw myself with..._ Somebody more like myself._"

She just stared at me. I couldn't meet her eyes anymore, afraid of what I might find. "And I don't want to scare you away or make you think I expect anything to happen. I just… I want you to realize that this is hard for me. _These foolish games are tearing me apart. And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart," _I sighed through my nose, hoping the wine would start affecting me so the honesty wasn't so harsh on my ego_. _"I love you, Ginny. But you come here, and you cry, and you grieve for so many things that you shouldn't have to grieve for. I watch you weep for loved ones, but I watch you laugh for me. Every time you shed a tear, you're…_You're breaking my heart."_

She bit her lip again and it drove me crazy in the best way possible. She seemed to be thinking and I didn't want to interrupt her, but she stood up and moved over to me, nestling herself in my lap. Her finger traced my eyebrow and down my cheek. It was such an intimate touch I closed my eyes and relished it

"When did you know?" she whispered.

"Know what?"

"That you loved me."

With her crimson hair framing her face, I looked her in the eye. She was so soft and warm; I let the truth of my words wash over her. "I thought it strange to see someone so happy to be out in a storm. _You took your coat off, stood in the rain." _She smiled at me and I took the moment to kiss her_. "You were always crazy like that."_


End file.
